I've learned a lot through my four different majors. Like:
1. Take-home tests are way harder than in-class ones. It's a take home test I'm not studying for that shit. It's open book. HAHAHA. I failed my psychology class my first semester of college. Alright, psychology is out.
2. F*** accounting forever and ever and ever as long as I live. I know how to use a debit card. I know how to write a check. I know how to check my bank account. Liabilities and debit and credit and checks and balances and all the other things I didn't understand in my THREE HOUR night accounting class at community college can leave my life forever.
My immature self likes to think I don't need to know that stuff. I'm surviving just fine knowing what I know. Which is my mom's phone number to call her and ask when I have no actual clue.
Sweet. Restaurant and Hotel Management is out. I don't want to take accounting. New major.
3. Nothing to do with my majors because it was required no matter what, but I suck at economics. I suck at understanding it. I suck at understanding politics. I'm 23 and I still think if we just print more money we can get out of debt. My high school econ teacher (who called me his bleeding heart liberal) would not be proud of all the progress I have not made. Bombed econ in college and lost my scholarship. Ouch.
Side lesson learned from losing the scholarship: college is expensive.
4. Communications is my thing. Anyone that knows me knows I love to talk and hate to be quiet. And anyone that knows me knows I will never use a communications degree to sit behind a desk in a human resources office and listen to people tell me they want a job or their boss harassed them or whatever else HR people do. (Not hating on HR people, it's just not for me).
My first Com teacher changeddddddd my life. I wish I could thank her. She made me love communications and made me want to understand it. People are so afraid of public speaking and I will speak to literally anyone in any setting. 1,000,000 people watching or not. I'll talk. And I can only hope I can find a way to show people how not scary it is.
5. That leads to my current major. Communicology. I didn't make it up. It exists at the University of Hawaii at Manoa. And it is the love of my life. I have learned so much about communicating affectively, dealing with conflicts, so many different aspects of relationships with people you love, and so much more.
I'm still not sure what I want to do with my degree. I'm still figuring out what part of it I like best and which part I want to focus on. Like I said before, I'm not in a hurry anymore. I know I will figure it out someday. For now I'm just using it to be more affective in communicating and stop being so competitive, sarcastic, argumentative, and passive aggressive. (But I love being passive aggressive so I'll never give that one up)
But for crying out loud can someone tell me why I HAVEN'T learned any of THESE things in college....
I like to call this the "why my mom has to live forever" list.
1. How to do my own taxes. Sure there are step by step instructions on the internet and sure I can pay someone to do them for me. But my mom is so good at getting me SO MUCH more money back on my tax returns. She is the knower of all taxes. And they are a requirement if I want to live and work in this country, therefore college should probably have taught me how to do them properly.
2. How to change a tire, my oil, and all other quick easy(so they say) car fixes. I like to think everyone on the planet is an axe murderer and anyone that pulls over to help me change a flat tire is probably going to kill me and hide my body in the desert. Therefore, I would have loved to be taught how to do these things on my own. It's for my own safety. Come on college!
3. How to tip properly in a restaurant. I personally do not need this lesson, due to me working in the industry. But hey, not everyone is going to work in the industry in their lifetime and that's why someone needs to give lessons on 'servers make $3 an hour after taxes and if you don't leave me a tip it is literally costing me money to bring you 17 coke refills and 4 sides of ranch and extra napkins you aren't going to even touch.' I rely on tips alone to pay my bills and eat bean burritos from taco bell. If you don't tip your server, they are almost working for free. This is an entirely separate rant on it's own. I'll save it for a later date.
4. How to cook, even the most basic meals. I don't care how dumb this is. Hook me up with a cooking class so I can stop calling my parents at insane hours of the night asking how long to boil an egg. (No that really happened. Sorry dad). I can't cook anything unless it has directions on a box. The grocery store is a shopping mall for foreign items I have never seen or heard of. And someday I hope to stop being made fun of because I can't cook. I can speak in front of a million people, so what if you can cook a delicious chicken?
5. How to be on time. I don't even know how they could teach this. I just can't do it. My logic is all out of whack and I have zero perception of actual time, distance, measurements or any other numbers. I think living 5 minutes from school means I'm going to hit every green light and be the only car on the road and find front parking on the lawn in front of my classroom and actually only take 5 minutes to get there. I know that is never the case. But I will forever leave 5 minutes before school starts with that logic in my head. If you want me to be somewhere on time, tell me it starts 30 minutes earlier than the actual time. I MIGHT make it then.
And the list could go on and on. If I wasn't going to be late for class I could add 500 more things to this list. I feel like I've been in college for so long and I'm still about to walk into the real world, unprepared as ever.
I'm not ashamed that I call my mom for constant advice. She's a smart lady. If she doesn't live to be 170 years old I'm in big trouble.
I also know I have learned a TON of stuff about life these last 4+ years. A lot has happened from 18-23. I'm more experienced than ever and still just as clueless.
If only I could do my own taxes, I would feel my degree is so much more worth it.
When I'm queen of the world you better believe I'm gonna make some changes to the college system.
Until next time, (because you all wanted a next time).
^^^me being mature
xo, Tatum
