Ten year reunions were once a time for old friends and classmates to gather from around the state, country, or even world. A time for old friends and classmates to show off their wives, show off their kids, lie about their jobs, lie about their divorces. Recently however, reunions have lost their glitz and glam. The generation before us has seemed to grow evermore disappointed in our dedication to stalking people's lives on the internet. What's the fun in going to your high school reunion if you already saw John Smith's wedding, pregnancy, child birth, and child's first 5 birthdays on Facebook?
Well maybe Facebook has taken the fun out of reunions. Maybe I already know who got married and who has kids and who works at a dead end job and who vacationed in Africa. I thought it was pretty un-fun at first to see everyone's lives unfolding before me on my computer screen. I thought it took the surprise out of my future reunion to already know what my graduating class was up to. (I think about my high school reunion because it means I'm getting older and we all know the mental breakdowns I have over that). But I learned something else about the lovely internet machine. Old classmates can quickly become new friends.
I've drifted apart from 90% of my friends from high school. I mean I live on a rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. That doesn't exactly scream "let's stay in touch." Facebook allowed me to like a status here and there, see where my old friends moved to, see everyone's big shiny engagement rings and chubby new babies. It also allowed me to see all the weird names my old classmates are coming up with for their offspring. They get weirder by the day. It's not a competition guys, your kid will never find a keychain with their name on it. Take it from someone who knows, that is devastating when you're 6.
My blog posts, however silly, serious, or stupid they may be, have gotten some unexpected praise from old high school mates. Profile pictures have earned likes from people I wasn't aware knew I existed. Let's be real, I didn't consider myself exactly "popular" in high school. I like to think my decently cool place of residence has earned me the few extra eyes on my Facebook page. For whatever reason though, I've befriended (in the best way you can through nothing but a computer) some people I've known for over ten years but never really knew.
Through a hilarious status about their job as a server I can see how I missed out on a great sense of humor back then. (I can also relate to the nightmares of the service industry). Through a status about the stresses of final exams I can see that I am not alone in pulling my hair out with worry and probably never was. And with a comment or two exchanged on these amusing Facebook statuses I begin to see someone I could probably be great friends with had I not moved so far away. In high school, we all found our cliques. That's not to say I didn't chat with these people in class or say hi at football games or drink with them at house parties. But I never really knew them for who they were. And it's probably a good thing we didn't truly know who each other was in high school because I was a strange person when I was 16. Just all around weird and immature (as we all were), striving to fit in any possible way I could.
Now I can look into these people's adult lives. See how we have grown to be similar without ever speaking. See how those I was closest to have grown to be so different than me. My views and beliefs have changed so much since entering my 20s. They are at the far end of the spectrum from some of my best friends even. To see people I barely know anymore reach out to me and tell me they feel the same, tell me they had a wedding dress that showed all their tattoos, tell me they are moving away from their home of 20+ years too, tell me they are clueless about what to do with their college degree like me. For lack of a better term, that's cool.
People I assumed to have barely graduated high school are now chemistry majors or in nursing school or graduating with an engineering degree. (See what happens when you assume? Sorry guys). People I thought would be stuck in their high school days, reliving their peak years until the end of time, are happily married to the love of their lives, in the best shape of their lives, or working at the career of their dreams. I mean can I just stop judging and assuming now? I'm clearly way off. Facebook is a place full of inspiration. It's full of advice. It's full of people who know how we feel. It's full of old friends who, in the simplest way, can become new friends.
I've learned to appreciate Facebook for all of its perks. I was able to raise money for a friend in need through it, as others are currently doing too. I learned that I might be decent at writing and that people enjoy reading what I have to say. I learned that 100 'Happy Birthday' posts can actually feel pretty good. So no, I won't be very surprised to hear all the last name changes at my high school reunion. I won't even be surprised to see some of my old teachers because I'm friends with them on Facebook too. I'll already know how old everyone's kids are. I'll already know who's a nurse and who's divorced and who's no longer living in Arizona.
Guess what parents. We're going to come together and hangout with our Facebook friends in the flesh. We're going to hug people we could only virtually touch before. We're going to show up, ready to face our old classmates as an open book. Can't lie about your fake fancy job when I already saw its nonexistence on the internet. Our reunions will be honest. They will be different. They are just like everything else of our generation. They are progressing. Old traditions are fun but you have to spice them up sometime. Change is not the end of the world. Facebook is not the end of the world either.
I appreciate the tiny friendships I've made through Facebook. I love the quirky comments on my statuses and the countless people who ask how Hawaii is and when they can come visit. We may not have wreaked havoc on Mountain Ridge High School together but we can laugh about our shitty jobs and cry about our final exams together now and still feel like we're kind of actually friends.
Maybe if I keep going at the rate I am now I'll be able to find a date to my best friend's wedding through the internet too.
Thanks Facebook friends for reading, liking, and supporting my silly blogs. You keep it alive.
xo Tatum
