Squeeze it in your vodka soda and drink up!
Seriously, this has been the longest week of my life, and it's only Wednesday.
Saturday night, I was laying on the beach at 2am, decompressing and destressing. I picked up 3 new jobs, moved into a new house, got into a new relationship, and completely ran out of 'me' time. A 2am beach sesh was completely necessary for my sanity. After watching huge bolts of lightning rip through the clouds over Oahu for 2 hours, I went back to my car and found myself standing in a pile of broken glass.
It took me a moment to register what was happening. I was looking through my passenger window at my open glove compartment. Only I wasn't looking through my window, I was standing on it shattered in the street. My open glove box was one wallet short. And after a few infinite seconds, I realized someone had busted my window and stole all my shit. Then I was raging.
Why did I leave my wallet in the car? Why was my $300 Marc Jacobs purse sitting out in plain sight? Why did I basically say, "hey desperate asshole, here's all my stuff, I'll be on the beach, be back later!"???? WHY WHY WHY. Why me? Why my car? Why now?
I've run out of "why" questions to ask myself. I've run out of "why" questions to ask the universe. And I've finally started seeing this situation for what it really is.
A test.
Universe, I'm going to crush this, hope you're paying close attention.
While I was busy crying over my lost possessions I failed to see how lucky I truly was. For some insane reason, I deposited almost $500 cash into my bank account that had been building up in my wallet the morning of my break in. I was in the grocery store that morning grabbing food for breakfast, already running late to meet new boyfriend who was waiting for these ingredients to feed me. My bank happened to be inside the store and I was feeling lazy and somewhat rushed so I thought to myself I would just leave and deposit my cash later. But something made me run up to the counter and just stick it in my account real quick anyway.
Then that night my wallet was stolen with only $50 inside it, rather than $500. Thank you to whatever force of nature pushed me to put my money in the bank.
Yes, it cost me $260 to replace my window. Yes, my favorite, most expensive purse that was a gift from my best friend is now gone. Yes, I had to go stand in line at the DMV to replace my license. Yes, I've been living off whatever cash I made this weekend because I had to cancel all of my debit cards. And yes, I am going to be okay.
I already cried. I screamed at the top of my lungs. I complained for days about how frustrated I am that I have to deal with this, just as I was settling in and reveling in my own happiness. Bottom line, it sucks. It's a huge set back financially. It's an inconvenience to replace all my lost shit. I'm going to Japan in 3 weeks and I had to spend money on my car instead of save it for my trip. Ok I'll get to the point... vent sesh over.
It could have been worse. And I can handle this. I suppose I was so happy with life at the moment, it felt like one small negative thing was crushing me into a million pieces. The negative energy I was receiving was being put right back into the air around me with my constant complaining. It's been hanging over me like a dark rain cloud.
That brings me to my blog. My beloved online journal where I pour my heart out. The place I've been too busy to visit recently. The place I used to use to connect with my internet friends. I feel like I've shared a lot of negative stories and rants on my blog. Here's another for the books. But I'm truly trying to look at this one in a different light.
The damn glass is half full, people. If you're looking at your own half empty glass, knock it off. Pull yourself up by the bootstraps. You know the clichés.
A good friend told me to look at each situation on a whole timeline of your life from birth to death. Is my car being robbed a huge set back in my life timeline, or is it just a speed bump along the way? A few months from now I won't even hardly remember this happened. Definitely a speed bump. And me and my busted car are going to cruise right on over it.
